CERN Physicist Arrested

A physicist at CERN has been arrested for suspicions of ties to Al Qaeda. Don’t worry I already checked www.hasthelhcdestoryedtheearth.com and www.hasthelargehadroncolliderdestroyedtheworldyet.com and both assured me that, so far, Al Qaeda has not managed to generate black holes that would consume the planet.

But what a great opportunity to muse along with a New York Times article..

“His work did not bring him into contact with anything that could be used for terrorism,” said the statement from the center, whose formal name is the European Organization for Nuclear Research.

Like, what NYTimes? That gigantic black hole generating machine at the LHC?

“None of our research has potential for military application, and all our results are published openly in the public domain.”

Ah yes, nothing published in public domain has ever had military application. Um.

4 Replies to “CERN Physicist Arrested”

  1. Ah yes, nothing published in public domain has ever had military application. Um.
    It’s actually not an unreasonable statement. Of course you’re right that in principle anything could have military applications, but there are no reasonably foreseeable military applications of the LHC. Plus it’s reasonable to point out that he had no access to secret or classified data, and that anything Al Qaeda wanted to know could be learned publicly.

  2. I reckon many prospective terrorists hold jobs, and this guy happens to work at CERN. It’s really irrelevant.
    Anyway, if he’s an analyst, he probably didn’t even get to handle the large hadrons.

  3. He worked for LHCb??! The terrorists are going after the anti-matter bombs! Curse Dan Brown for spilling the beans on that one!

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