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The Weight of Software

A story, from Jeff Silverman:

Whenever you build an airplane, you have to make sure that each part weighs no more than allocated by the designers, and you have to control where the weight it located to keep the center of gravity with limits. So there is an organization called weights which tracks that.
For the 747-100, one of the configuration items was the software for the navigation computer. In those days (mid-1960s), the concept of software was not widely understood. The weight of the software was 0. The weights people didn’t understand this so they sent a guy to the software group to understand this. The software people tried mightily to explain that the software was weightless, and the weights guy eventually went away, dubious.
The weights guy comes back a few days later with a box of punch cards (if you don’t know what a punch card is, e-mail me and I will explain). The box weighed about 15 pounds. The weights guy said “This box contains software”. The software guys inspected the cards and it was, in fact, a computer program. “See?”, the wights guy said, “This box weighs about 15 pounds”. “You don’t understand”, the software guys responded, “The software is in the holes”.

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Fun with Linda

For fun, answer the following in the comment section, without reading what others have left in the comment section:

Linda is 31 years old, single, outspoken, and very bright. She majored in philosophy. As a student, she was deeply concerned with issues of discrimination and social justice, and also participated in anti-nuclear demonstrations.
Which is more likely?
1. Linda is a bank teller.
2. Linda is a bank teller and is active in the feminist movement.

Then read this.

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Arsenic and Old Dave

I am now the sum of the first four positive factorials of positive numbers!

The most depressing thing about the age of thirty three was that Alexander the Great died at 33. Dude, to be 33 and not have people putting “the Great” after your name is super depressing.

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DARPA's Real Quantum Project?

From the Uncyclopedia entry on computers:

How Computers Work
Inside a computer case is a midget that intakes power and outputs graphics. On an average computer, this is an average male midget. High end computers contain baby giraffes or sometimes Links (which will periodically shut down, some blame this on power consumption, but this is actually due to the Links leaving the computer in order to save Zeldas from Gilbert Gottfrieds). Cheaper Hewlett-Packard computers generally come standard with a retard midget. Macs and Dells run on magnets which make them better then anything else! Rumors have surfaced recently that DARPA is working on a computer that runs on zombie midgets, the name for this project is quantum computing. But this does not include Mall Zombies.

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Physical Review Alphabet Quintfecta?

Does anyone know if any author has ever had a paper published in the entire alphabet of Physical Reviews? (A,B,C,D,E) And if not, doesn’t that sound like a fun task to try to achieve. OK, perhaps “fun” is the wrong word. Even better if you could carry out the task with alphabetical order corresponding to chronological order. Even better still would be if you could carry out the task with reverse alphabetical order corresponding to chronological order.

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Transatlantic Communication of a Different Kind

The telectroscope:

Hardly anyone knows that a secret tunnel runs deep beneath the Atlantic Ocean. In May 2008, more than a century after it was begun, the tunnel will finally be completed. Immediately afterwards, an extraordinary optical device called a Telectroscope will be installed at both ends which will miraculously allow people to see right through the Earth from London to New York and vice versa.

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Pain…

is realizing that you’ve spent twenty straight hours working on a grant proposal. Fry, meet Brain. Brain, meet Fry.

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Wanted: Quantum Loonies

Dude, can I get a Canadian aerospace company to win a United States federal contract and as a consequence have to fund my quantum computing research?

Dalhousie research is taking a quantum leap into next-generation computing.
The university has received $2 million from Lockheed Martin that will benefit the university’s basic scientific research in an area of quantum computing, physics and material sciences.
The money, to be spread over four years, is part of the company’s commitment to spend $242 million in Atlantic Canada as part of its industrial benefits obligation arising from the federal government’s contract with Lockheed Martin to buy 17 C-130J Super Hercules aircraft.

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Robert Mondavi

Robert Mondavi, who helped put Napa Valley on the world wine map has passed away age 94. The most famous story about Mondavi involves a fight:

The Mondavis moved to Napa, and Cesare, Robert and Robert’s younger brother, Peter, ran the winery. But there were disagreements about how the winery should be run, and after Cesare’s death, Robert and Peter clashed. While Robert, the more flamboyant of the two brothers, pushed for better wines, Peter favored a more conservative path. One day, they ended up in a fistfight, and Robert was asked to leave the family business

So far, in making my own wine, I have yet to get in a fight with anyone, although I did have to fight to get a bung out of a carboy…